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"I can't help it, if I wanted to. I can't help myself, even if I could . . ." . . . but, I'm a 'Michael-holic' to the very core ;-) ! Miss him more, everyday.

I Can't help it, but...

...I think about Michael all day, every day.

Listening to his music...
Playing a certain song over & over & over, again...
Watching videos...
Hanging out in my favorite forums...
Keeping up w/latest news...
Praying for his Mom, his kids, Janet...
It keeps him close to my heart...

It's like catching up w/a long-lost friend - my friend, the friend I never met, but miss sooo very much.

Why is that?

Black child with one white glove that glows

Black child with one white glove that glows
...via www.mj-777.com (Oct 23rd)

I Look to You - Whitney Houston

...is this a cry for help...did we miss it, again...? As I lay me down Heaven hear me now I’m lost without a cause After giving it my all Winter storms have come And darkened my sun After all that I’ve been through Who on earth can I turn to?

Saturday, September 24, 2011

My goodness, where do I begin...


by An Marie on Thursday, September 8, 2011 at 10:15pm

There are sooo many things running thru my mind regarding this trial, until my head is 
spinning!

I'm writing in no particular order. I'm simply thinking... 

§         What is propofol?
§         An anesthetic used in surgeries to render patients unconscious. Therefore, for what it is - it ISN'T a prescription drug, it ISN'T a narcotic, so it’s not addictive & it certainly ISN'T a cure/treatment for insomnia.
§         Wanting to include Michael's past addiction to prescription pain meds is lame. Thank you Judge Pastor for ruling it out as irrelevant, since a prescription drug didn't kill Michael; pain meds didn't kill Michael - it was "propofol intoxication."
§         The Defense & the media refuse to make this distinction regarding this drug.  Propofol is not a narcotic!  It's NOT addictive!  Propofol is not a PRESCRIPTION DRUG!!! You can't buy this stuff over the counter!  Make the dang distinction! Everything found in Michael's system, was everything Murray claimed to have given him. EVERYTHING.
§         The Defense wants to claim Michael drank it, which would explain "why" it was found in his stomach.  Well, it was also found in his eyes.  If the Defense thinks it can explain away one area of the body where this drug 'should not have been,' then they'll need to explain them ALL away.  Would they dare claim Michael used the propofol as eye drops?
§         If Michael could have 'drank' this stuff & achieve the desired result, which was sleep, then Murray wasn't needed.  He was a waste of money, especially @ the tune of $150,000.00 a month.
§         Had this trial been delayed, the potential jury pool would have had even more exposure to whatever information (correct/incorrect; biased/unbiased; lies or truth) & excrement the media would have put out there for consumption.
§         This was a ploy to push things as far back as possible, in order to tie the hands of the court & FORCE them to lock up the jurors. The arrogance of this man is beyond words...
§         Murray wanted to hog-tie others (literally, jail them), yet he posted bond (to be FREE). He’s allowed to go home every night & sleep in his own bed, frequent bars & coffee shops, visit Disneyland, shop @ the mall, eat whatever food he chooses, visit whatever restaurant he wants, watch whatever television program or listen to whatever radio station he chooses...is he forfeiting HIS freedom during HIS trial?
§         This spin story that he didn't know Mike was addicted to drugs is lame, because the autopsy report didn't indicate an addition to anything.  Mike was described as a healthy 50-year old male w/healthy organs.  A healthy organ in an addict is an oxymoron.
§         Weaning MJ off propofol...again, this drug isn't addictive.  WHY were so many bottles of this anesthetic ordered if this was the situation?  I believe Murray got the "big-head," thinking if he could knockout Michael Jackson, he could offer his "new service" to others L & make a lil side ch-change.  These bottles were for Michael & other unsuspecting insomniacs.  Heaven help us!
§         Murray's excuse that other doctors gave Mike this drug, is irrelevant.  Michael didn't die on their watch, he died on Murray's.
§         Murray wants to claim Michael gave this drug to himself; that he woke up & out of desperation injected himself & overdosed.  The problem w/that is:

1)      Had Murray performed the "job" for which he was hired (but not professionally qualified), Michael should not have come out from under the anesthesia until Murray brought him out;

2)      IF Michael had awakened, Murray should have known - in other words, his A$$ should have been in the room;

3)      He claims he left Michael for only two minutes, well a brain deprived of oxygen for two minutes leads to brain damage;

4)      Murray left the room of an unconscious patient to make a private phone call…why?  Michael wouldn’t have been able to overhear his conversation; QUESTION: Was there someone else in the room who would have overheard Murray’s “private” conversation?  IS THAT WHY HE LEFT THE ROOM? After doing his part in preparing/setting up the circumstances for this "mysterious someone else" to kill Miss Katherine's son - he then, had to leave the room so as NOT to be a witness??!  Murray’s defense is, either Michael gave himself the overdose or someone else did.  (I hate to say it, but it sounds like a possible conspiracy, of which Murray still played the lead part.  Arrrggghhh!)

5)      The opportunity for either of these scenarios to take place should not have been present;

6)      The drip Murray used wasn't even appropriate - he used a "make-shift" drip instead of a metered pump; one can’t even make the argument that the pump wasn’t calibrated properly & place the blame on the manufacturer.

7)      Murray is nothing but a legalized drug-pusher w/a medical license.  Drug dealers go to jail everyday for supplying & selling their drug of choice.
  • YES, we each have a personal responsibility when it comes to our health, but we expect to be able to "trust" our doctors.
  • I doctor shop all the time.  I’m on General Practitioner number five.  At my age, I want someone who understands my menopausal symptoms ;-) & not chalk ALL my aches & pains up to my getting “OLD!”
  •  I’m on dermatologist number four.  #4 listened when I told her what worked for me, previously…she put me on the same regime & now, she’s a keeper.
  • Right now, I’m on orthopedic surgeon number three.  With my ankle (I broke it a few years, ago), I want someone who won't treat me as if I have one foot in the grave & should simply settle for the aches & pains, due to my age.... I will always “shop” for doctors who have my best interest @ heart; doctors who say they CAN & WILL help me.  If I tell you what my issues are & you say you can help, I’m going to trust you to do just that.  If I tell you what has worked for me in the past & you decide to roll w/that, I’m going to trust you to know what you’re doing, suggest something better, or something that works just as well.  Am I wrong?
  • Murray's cardiac patients sing his praises.  Well, he did what a cardiac surgeon was supposed to do - take care of the heart. During surgeries, no one can convince me Murray worked double-duty: Heart Surgery AND administering anesthesia to his patients to keep them under!  Don't even split your lip to suggest it!
  • I'd like to hear from his patients suffering from insomnia...OH!  That's right!  He shouldn't be treating insomniacs, that's NOT his area of expertise.
  • Murray veered out of his lane.  Period.
Murray thinks because others gave Mike the drug that made it okay for him to give Mike this drug, too.  Well, it wasn't okay.  In my opinion, I believe Michael asked Murray if he knew of anesthesiologist who would help him.  What does Murray do? He CONVINCES Mike he can provide this "sleep service" to him, & that another doctor wouldn't be needed (...more $$ for Murray).  Remember, Mike asked the nurse to "find him an anesthesiologist" who would put him to sleep @ night & wake him up in the morning.  When she said, no - he asked her if SHE would do it.  Again, she said no.  The nurse was more honorable than all of them!  Don't forget, Mike asked for an ANESTHESIOLOGIST. He asked for one.  That tells me he knew what kind of doctor was best qualified, certified, trained & legally authorized to administer propofol.  Murray was none of these things.  Yes, an anesthesiologist is an M.D.  They train to do one thing & one thing, only.  That is a huge responsibility, all by itself.  They don't need to do anything else.
  • Murray refuses to accept responsibility for administering this drug to Michael.  "I’ve done nothing wrong."  Hell, yes you did! Even accidents have repercussions & consequences.  Murray should have been charged w/gross negligence; a lack of regard for human life, so much more…  For this man to continually whine about 'not doing anything wrong,' is just grating against my skin.  Just because Sally Blue jumped off the bridge, doesn't mean Murray should have jumped, too!
  •  Michael - someone's Son, Brother, Father, Uncle, Cousin, Friend, Ex-husband & Benefactor - is no longer on this earth because of Murray's actions (& lack of proper action).
Murray, you were wrong.  Period.



Sunday, August 21, 2011

The VERITAS Project


Excellent work!  Absolutely excellent!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Michael Jackson - Michael Jackson Surveillance Footage 'Deleted' - Contactmusic News

Michael Jackson - Michael Jackson Surveillance Footage 'Deleted' - Contactmusic News
LuvofMJ  ( 3)


. . . hmmm, who gives a "rat's pa-tootie" about the surveillance video? A timeline as to what Murray was doing (... & what was going on) has already been established. ALL the drugs found in Michael's system, Murray has already admitted giving him. Murray's lawyers are playing semantics: "Murray didn't give Michael anything that should have killed him." Nooo, not if administered properly & under the intended circumstances by a licensed professional, trained & certified to do so. Does that describe Murray? No it doesn't. He's NOT an anesthesiologist - licensed, certified or trained! He administered this drug outside of its intended realm of usage; he failed to call 911 in a timely manner; he performed one-handed CPR; he performed CPR on a bed; he failed to monitor his patient w/the proper equipment; he left the room where his patient was; he was distracted by sending personal text messages; he was on the phone holding personal conversations instead of devoting his attention to his patient; he withheld information from the paramedics when they arrived; he lied about weaning Mike off of the drug (he had already ordered hundreds of vials of Propofol - had some of them sent to his girlfriend's place)....DAMN! Who needs surveillance tapes??!

I live in Georgia. Do I need to move to CA & prosecute this case??!

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

In Loving Memory - Archive 5

Below is a beautiful love poem, the Forum Fan-Mily (from michaeljackson.com), composed in memory of our Beloved SuperNova!  Wow...


~~~Dear Michael~~~


You walked into my heart, back in 1972. Ever since that day, I knew I'd be in love with you. (Necey)
With the mic in your hand you commanded the stage with a sound we had not yet heard. (NoAnniesNotOKMJ)
The crowds cheered, listening carefully to your golden words. (This Is Thriller28)
With a single touch, your magic.. we felt from head to toe;
It reverberated in our hearts and in our smile it did show. (Nikkikate)
You sang so sweet, and boy when you danced… no other could compete. (Viscera19)
You made all of us smile with your unique and amazing musical style. (MJGodofPop)
Your heart was pure; your music so real, at least that’s the way you made me feel. (mgssoutherngirl4’s brother)
Your music inspired millions; you made the world dance. (denissemjfan)
Fedora, sparkling glove; let’s not forget your tip-toe stance. (Criminally_Smooth)
And nothing could put us more in trance… than your golden pants! (vilamag)
From your youth and ever after, you filled our hearts with joy and laughter. (MJLuv4Ever)
I thought what a precious jewel sent from heaven above. (Azure)
You shared your beautiful smile; you healed the world with love. (sandramtz)
Love, generosity, and grace incarnate; misunderstood, slandered, and used. You rose above the monotony and transcended being accused. (poshlily)
Your open heart you shared with the world, the love you gave was timeless. And every time they tore at you, you chose to answer with kindness. (LillyandGish)
And in a world with no hope… it was found in you. (cynicalgirl)
You still chose to love regardless of what the world had put you through. (P.Y.T.isMe)
You were so humble; you never bragged about your accomplishments. (MJJ♥PYT4Ever)
And in this time of sorrow we also send your family our sentiments. (LuvIsMJ)
Through your voice we heard compassion, compassion that embraced our hearts. (Tambriell_MJ)
You taught the world how to love unconditionally. Maybe that was your true art. (NotSoDirtyDiana)
You have captured my heart and never let it go, I will love you forever...this I think you know. (Himmycat18)
I just hope one day I can join you and we can finally meet; you touched so many lives; in your music we did retreat. (autumn_mist_127)
A hopeful heart wrapped ‘round our earth, your notes took to the sky (lorinelizabeth)
But just trust you are in all of us as we still wonder why? (cheluvmj4evr)
Our hearts are broken; can't believe you are gone, but your spirit, your legend, your music lives on. (Donnamichael)
You’re like magic in the night the stars that shine so bright; one day you were here, the next day out of sight. (mgssoutherngirl4)
You gave to the world your music and love, but you were needed more from up above. (mjfan082958)
You let us feel the peace in your garden of dreams. We touched heaven sitting upon your wings. (Lonely heart)
On earth you "looked to heaven to fulfill a prophecy." Now up above you are finally set free. (MjsmyTeacher)
You loved life, risked love, and kept on loving up until the end. (Dee.Nagao)
You finally made it back to your beloved Neverland. (Michaeru Jakkusan)
Michael you're our supernova...yes! To have lived the same time as you, we are truly blessed. (LuvofMJ)
Your beautiful smile and all your bliss will forever be cherished and truly missed. (slclvn)
You will always be...the most special man in the world to me. (iloveyou.mj)
You danced with flair; you danced with passion and always showed the world your endless compassion. (HannahluvsMJ)
I cannot imagine the time which comes without you and your songs. (janaveronika)
We will never forget you Michael, not in a million years to come. (i♥mj)
I love you more than you'll ever know, my heart is broken because you had to go. (invinciblemj)
Speechless, speechless, that's how you make me feel. Listening to your music, I hear the beating of your heart. (sophie)
And like you said in “Will You Be There,” we will never let you part. (lanore76)
Michael, I never can say goodbye because in my heart you'll never die. (MJJ4LifeFan)
You taught me lessons I once ignored. I feel indebted forever to you sweet Michael, I love you so much more. (celtic7rose)
I cry to sleep to your sweet song; how I wish you were still here. Though your time with us wasn't long God's presence brings you near. (MY-LUV-4_MICHAEL)
Your beautiful music shined a light from heaven, your compassion outshined the world and at that moment your soul drifted away… (kaluvzmc)
…And left the world so cold. (jayshelle78)
The only words I speak, from when I wake up in the morning until I sleep;
I say Michael I love you...I love you more deep. (Neeldaswani)
Like the angel you are, forever you'll shine bright as the North Star. (JustLove)
The world has suffered a big loss...but you’re still here just looking from afar. (bowlinghallen)
Michael, you're shining brighter than the stars at night, thank you, my miracle man for bringing me back to the light. (annetonie)
Love was your message, smile was your tool. Thank you for showing us the way, thank you for being you. (optimist)
You said heaven could wait but I guess that it could not.(babsette)
You will be forever immortalized in my heart. (Mjtruelove)
Our love for you will never die. Maybe one day will come when we do not cry. (mybaby)
As the man in the mirror, you've made us eternally love and admire you. And for that beloved Michael, our love and admiration shall stay forever true. (KinGofPoP411Jnky)
You will dance your dance in the sky and forever be divine. (Annieruokay)
And though you’ll forever be in our hearts, the hurt will heal with time. (MJsWendy)
When you wish upon a star; your dreams can take you near or far. (CassieForMaxwell)
In dreams you lose your heartache and I will believe the dream that I wish will come true. (tabea)
I pray that God will hold you close and in His arms enclose you. (smokymountaingirl)
God said "Michael you have done your best for the world and you've done it well, now it's time for you to rest my son; it’s time for your soul to sail. (luvmj4allmylife)
I mourn the death of the one who gave; the loss of the ONE so adored. (MJJmahal)
Michael, it is so empty without you here on the dance floor. (Danielle73)
Even though it hurts we have to live, because we are your army. (Solonoy)
And if we ever made you feel you let us down, Michael we’re so sorry. (KingofPopnLuv)
With tears in our eyes this is how we say goodbye. Your love and spirit will never die. (Lonnie38)
I love you now and I'll love you later, just promise me that you'll return the favor. (4TheLoveofMichael)
I can feel you in the blowing wind, the singing birds and the twinkling stars; your spirit will forever have a place in my heart. (Caroline96)
We're not merely fans, we're followers of truth. For all of our lives we watched someone with proof.
Proof that our souls could soar if we dare to live our imagination, that our hearts could do more if we loved without hesitation. (CarlaMarie)
You will never be forgotten, you'll be in our hearts, minds and dreams; we all have your back....we're all on your team. (aj13)
How do you spell love? Michael Joseph Jackson of course! (Debrah)
We admire our King, and will love him everyday just like he taught us. (Michael 4ever)
Amazing are your talents and honored fans are we, to carry the torch of your life's work for all to behold and see. (Countryrocker)
You were our story hero; you were our friend in times of joy and pain. (PCR)
If tears could build the steps and memories a lane, I would walk right up to heaven and bring you back home again. (MsKGB)
Every day is a struggle but we're trying to get better. Michael, we'll love you always and I hope you see our letter. (JadeMango)
To the Angels wrap your wings around him and hold him really tight. (Shirley_gregson)
Take care of our King, we know you will. Bring him into heaven’s light. (AChildsHeart)
So fly away now, the skies are shining; fly away and smile, we will be watching. (The marchioness)
Michael you are love; Michael you are now with Him. (rndream)
The light of your life will continue to illuminate the universe…and never dim. (speechlesslvmj)
LONG LIVE THE KING! (gunverdi)


Love,
Your Fans
We Love You Forever More


Each line from this poem was written by a forum member of michaeljackson.com.


~*~*Fans from the forum michaeljackson.com~*~*
(November 10, 2009)

Friday, February 4, 2011

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

The Hippocratic Oath: Modern Version

I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this covenant:

I will respect the hard-won scientific gains of those physicians in whose steps I walk, and gladly share such knowledge as is mine with those who are to follow.

I will apply, for the benefit of the sick, all measures [that] are required, avoiding those twin traps of overtreatment and therapeutic nihilism.

I will remember that there is art to medicine as well as science, and that warmth, sympathy, and understanding may outweigh the surgeon's knife or the chemist's drug.

I will not be ashamed to say "I know not," nor will I fail to call in my colleagues when the skills of another are needed for a patient's recovery.

I will respect the privacy of my patients, for their problems are not disclosed to me that the world may know. Most especially must I tread with care in matters of life and death. If it is given me to save a life, all thanks. But it may also be within my power to take a life; this awesome responsibility must be faced with great humbleness and awareness of my own frailty. Above all, I must not play at God.

I will remember that I do not treat a fever chart, a cancerous growth, but a sick human being, whose illness may affect the person's family and economic stability. My responsibility includes these related problems, if I am to care adequately for the sick.

I will prevent disease whenever I can, for prevention is preferable to cure.

I will remember that I remain a member of society, with special obligations to all my fellow human beings, those sound of mind and body as well as the infirm.

If I do not violate this oath, may I enjoy life and art, respected while I live and remembered with affection thereafter. May I always act so as to preserve the finest traditions of my calling and may I long experience the joy of healing those who seek my help.

Written in 1964 by Louis Lasagna, Academic Dean of the School of Medicine at Tufts University, and used in many medical schools today.

January 11, 2011 – Today, Dr. Conrad Murray is indicted for manslaughter in the death of Michael Joseph Jackson (1958-2009)

THE HIPPOCRATIC OATH TODAY: MEANINGLESS RELIC OR INVALUABLE MORAL GUIDE?

The Hippocratic Oath is one of the oldest binding documents in history. Written in antiquity, its principles are held sacred by doctors to this day: treat the sick to the best of one's ability, preserve patient privacy, teach the secrets of medicine to the next generation, and so on. "The Oath of Hippocrates," holds the American Medical Association's Code of Medical Ethics (1996 edition), "has remained in Western civilization as an expression of ideal conduct for the physician." Today, most graduating medical-school students swear to some form of the oath, usually a modernized version. Indeed, oath-taking in recent decades has risen to near uniformity, with just 24 percent of U.S. medical schools administering the oath in 1928 to nearly 100 percent today.

Yet paradoxically, even as the modern oath's use has burgeoned, its content has tacked away from the classical oath's basic tenets. According to a 1993* survey of 150 U.S. and Canadian medical schools, for example, only 14 percent of modern oaths prohibit euthanasia, 11 percent hold convenant with a deity, 8 percent foreswear abortion, and a mere 3 percent forbid sexual contact with patients—all maxims held sacred in the classical version. The original calls for free tuition for medical students and for doctors never to "use the knife" (that is, conduct surgical procedures)—both obviously out of step with modern-day practice. Perhaps most telling, while the classical oath calls for "the opposite" of pleasure and fame for those who transgress the oath, fewer than half of oaths taken today insist the taker be held accountable for keeping the pledge.

Indeed, a growing number of physicians have come to feel that the Hippocratic Oath is inadequate to address the realities of a medical world that has witnessed huge scientific, economic, political, and social changes, a world of legalized abortion, physician-assisted suicide, and pestilences unheard of in Hippocrates' time. Some doctors have begun asking pointed questions regarding the oath's relevance: In an environment of increasing medical specialization, should physicians of such different stripes swear to a single oath? With governments and health-care organizations demanding patient information as never before, how can a doctor maintain a patient's privacy? Are physicians morally obligated to treat patients with such lethal new diseases as AIDS or the Ebola virus?

Other physicians are taking broader aim. Some claim that the principles enshrined in the oath never constituted a shared core of moral values, that the oath's pagan origins and moral cast make it antithetical to beliefs held by Christians, Jews, and Muslims. Others note that the classical Oath makes no mention of such contemporary issues as the ethics of experimentation, team care, or a doctor's societal or legal responsibilities. (Most modern oaths, in fact, are penalty-free, with no threat to potential transgressors of loss of practice or even of face.)

With all this in mind, some doctors see oath-taking as little more than a pro-forma ritual with little value beyond that of upholding tradition. "The original oath is redolent of a convenant, a solemn and binding treaty," writes Dr. David Graham in JAMA, the Journal of the American Medical Association (12/13/00). "By contrast, many modern oaths have a bland, generalized air of 'best wishes' about them, being near-meaningless formalities devoid of any influence on how medicine is truly practiced." Some physicians claim what they call the "Hypocritic Oath" should be radically modified or abandoned altogether.

What is your opinion? What do you feel is the Hippocratic Oath's relevance today? Is it a pointless anachronism or an invaluable moral guide? Should aspiring doctors still be made to take some version of the oath? If you're a doctor, would you take the oath again? Why?

Non-doctor responses/post your thoughts…

*Orr, R. D., N. Pang, E. D. Pellegrino, and M. Siegler. 1997. "Use of the Hippocratic Oath: A Review of Twentieth Century Practice and a Content Analysis of Oaths Administered in Medical Schools in the U.S. and Canada in 1993." The Journal of Clinical Ethics 8 (Winter): 377-388.clip_image001